Saturday, November 19, 2005:
ahhhhaha. wonderful. love the feeling how i get to come online everyday to blog again.. HAHAH. its simply.. smashing. hahah. i miss coming online.. and FINALLY i get to use the computer again. WHOOPIE-DOOO..
went for church movie night tonight. we have it like once a month at evangel, and always before it we'd have worship.. its basically some kind of fellowship night la. we watched stnad by me, this really old flick, but it was those kind of movies with a moral at the end of the story, and it was about friendship.. :D its great. wasnt much of a story line anyway. but the point is, anyway, the band had to play today so i went down at like, 4 pm to go have jam prac at church.. and i kinda got out of control again. i realise that you know, i kinda (and more often now) want things my way. especially like how things run and all. like lets say for example, we were practicing lord reign in me in church and somehow chris couldnt sing the song order right, as in, he wasnt really sure how the song goes. and i'm like no no no, you must sing it like this. and after that he looked kinda down and out. and seeing him like that made me feel guilty and sad of what i did. plus he's the worship leader.. man, its like a super bad habit i have, that i cant control. and i realise what i do is wrong abit too late. and it just smacks me right in the face.. and i get so irritated with myself. sorry chris.
reminds me of how hard it is trying to be the perfect christian, to carry god's grace and love around us, to clothe ourselves in his peace and splendor. i mean, like how do i do it man. i'm only human. and sometines its just so hard to act in the correct way, in a way that pleases god. but anyway. i think the best solution is just to give it all back to him and trust that he will make everything okay. even though it isnt. cos if you believe in his power, he can and will make things alright for me, in the way that makes him and myself happy. correct? through god, all things are (ALWAYS) possible. :)
ah well. THIS is my new blogskin. haha. does it look nice? i'd prob put in a better designed pic. cos i was in a rush last night and i had no ideas. so i just used something i did before. hahaha. oh well. better sleep early then. long day tmr. I CAN'T WAIT! haha. brmc, then lunch with the study group and then games PLUS i'm finally going to see my grandparents after like. what. 3 months? and i wonder if we're gonna continue with part two of evolution. haha. i dont even know what to wear and bring man! its like. no books to church! WAAAAAA. strange feeling. hehehehe.
haha. so yepp. cya. ;)
a shout of praise.
11:15 PM
